Episodes
114. Design is a bumhole
Hello. Welcome to our first episode of 2023! We're the Didi and Gogo of podcasting. So while we wait for Godot come and rummage with us through the dustbin of design and pop culture detritus.
113. CRYPTO CHANCERS
Rob has written to his MP and Ministers about AI art and the rights of illustrators. Jon remains wracked with self doubt and incertitude. Yes, it's another cheery episode of the podcast that is and isn't about design!
112. Always make all the bacon
I'm sure that there have been more Prime Ministers this year than North v South episodes and it's all Rob's fault. But here we are again; talking about the state of Twitter and what the alternatives are, as well as the usual design news and things on our desks.
111. What is kibbled onion?
In which we bid farewell to a truly great illustrator Kim Jung Gi. We talk about how much daily graft do we put into our creative lives and are we satisfied by the output? Other news includes LEGO and D&D, Lucian Freud at the National, Bonnier Books logo, GDPR nightmare, Andy Budd's world of wisdom, followed by the ying and yang of pies.
110. It's not Slough is it?
In which Rob drinks beer and gets rather angry about tech boys. Jon, meanwhile, is worried about his dog.
109. Dynamic isle flotante
After a brief (for us) hiatus of 84 days we return to blether on about, in no particular order: Branston pickle, vertical cities, AI art generators, Jessica Hische, Rings of Power, Design Principals, Awesome Merchandise, Tattly, LEGO Atari, and Fungus the Bogeyman.
108. A dog on a wheel
This week in episode 108 Rob's been to Birmingham to find enlightenment. Jon's been ripping up carpets trying to find inspiration and comes to the conclusion that he left it in London about 10 years ago.
107. Margaret Atwood with a flamethrower
This week in the podcast with its fingers in the pies, we talk iconic film soundtracks while paying our respects to the genius of Vangelis. Also hello Elizabeth line and hopefully goodbye to boring branding (don't hold your breath).
106. Hwæt!
Rob's just got back from iceland. He didn't bring a prawn ring back mind you. Just lots of pictures. Also he ate horse. Like a dirty dragon. We talk about his trip of a lifetime. We also geek out about notebooks, the ZX Spectrum, Etherington Brothers, PJ Harvey & Space Dwarfs.
105. Dwarf furniture
Our two brave soldiers have clawed their way out of their fetid sickbeds to bring you the very latest in random stuff they've found on the internet. And design news. They peer into Jodrell Bank's new identity, wonder at Twitter's continued interference, peruse some new fonts and mull over designer labels?
104. When it all went Muppety
This week Rob's been preparing for his first ever exhibition while droning on about his new toy. Jon's been avoiding any work by trimming hedges in the snow. Catch up with the latest brouhaha over Rob's controversial Cornish pasty made by Swiss bakers.
103. Gastropug!
Too old to code. Hands up who thinks this should be on a t-shirt? Hands down who's too old to wear t-shirts? No one left? Oh well; on with the show…
102. The least interactive podcast out there
Is it ever a good idea to tunnel under avolcano? In a world where this sounds like a good idea to many of our leaders, we discuss following narrative and finding truth. Rob's been watching pottery porn. Jon's been up a volcano taking photos of pin badges. Why, oh why do we need Client Day? Why do we need another version of The Ipcress File? Why do we need free microfibre cloths with everything? Why do we eat so many pies? Answers inside. Possibly.
101. Can your dogs open the door?
Yes, it's that thing that nobody wanted in the first place. No, not NFTs. Not the Metaverse. Yes, It's us! NORTH V SOUTH IS BACK! And this time it's not only DISRUPTIVE and TRANSFORMATIVE. It literally MAKES NO SENSE!
99. A polished Saveloy
If you can't polish a turd then can you polish a saveloy? Here at North V South we give it a bloody good attempt. This week in the podcast that is, but isn't, recorded very often we discuss (among other things): Black Library novels; applying immediacy filters and other unwanted tips; a new boardgame magazine Senet ; War of the Worlds; The creator of Minifigs; Darth Maul and Fighting Fantasy, Ellie Sampson paper art, notable bookcover designs of 2019, and, to cap it off, pies. Although pies with lids are just stews with hats on.
98. Not much demand for herding
Episode 98 is piping hot and cooling on the window sill. We take a peek under the crisp pastry lid of the zeitgeist and find cyber trucks, Chris Ware comics, lovely stationery shops, board games a go-go, cartoon nihilism, and the inner gubbins of pies. With just under a month until Christmas and a Tory junta, join North V South in a societal meltdown as we dance naked through the streets, waving our willies at our clients as we go.
97. Uncleftish Beholding
North v South – less regular than a bran-intolerate heroin addict. We ask the questions that the Conservative and Labour parties are too afraid to ask: How are your biorhythms this morning? Will there be baby woodpeckers in Rob's garden this winter? What is a brand guru and is it strictly legal? And, finally, what kind of casserole would Darth Vader eat?
96. A long discussion about eggs
Get ready to shed 96 tears. We're back. We talk Wim Crouwel, Somerset House, Nokia, rival podcasts, paper aeroplanes, Lego adverts, ketchup and the imminent end of civilisation.
95. Pumping yourself on the sofa
You want eclectic. We deliver. Our Deeply Unintelligent™ AI units have digested the internet and spend an hour talking about a whole load of utter nonsense: Camping, depression, 3D resin printers, Blender, Bocage, Lemmie, Mindhunter, Creative constipation, Inktober, District 9, Alan Moore, Vanta black cars, Boots, John Harris, Dieter Rams, London Design Festival. And pies.
94. People are stupid
A ruined building stands alone, wreathed in vines, wrapped in mystery. Its cracked portico reveals a dark and brooding entrance, occasionally brightened by a pulsing red dot of light. Inside lurks Episode 94 of the podcast that is, and isn't, about design. Lost in time. Forgotten by civilisation. Waiting. Just for you… In this episode we look at a new Akira, online criticism, linocuts, LEGO Space, single line typefaces, meander maps and Apollo XI in realtime.
93. Go outside and act like a turkey
Hello. It's us again. We continue to creep towards a hundred much like Geoff Boycott in his pomp. This week we talk about, in no particular order: model robots, LEGO Space, Worzel Gummidge, notebooks, touch typing, Mac Pro, sweet wrappers, knots, the evils of social media, and, biensûr, pies.
92. Back to the fog and bad food
Roll up, roll up. Listen to a dog drinking beer. From Belgium. The beer, that is. The dog's from England, mate. In other news: Panic's Playdate, BT's new look, Manga at the British something or other, Microsoft browsers, Shanghai bookshops, and, naturellement, pies.
91. Why, why, why, why, why, why
This week's podcast focuses on things we make that have no real worth. Many would say that covers this podcast and they're probably right. We look at recent news items that follow this trend; such as re-edits of 42-year-old children's films, speculative architectural visualisations, and self-digitising notebooks. "Why, why, why, why, why?", asks one of our hosts. But without making things that seemingly have no worth, would we end up with beauties like x6udpngx (https://x6ud.github.io/#/)?
90. Zombie Pie
Welcome to the first episode in a new series of North V South: the podcast that is, and isn't, about design. We're talking taking breaks, blue plaques, iMacs, Kellog's, Capcom and Hellboy, among many other bits and bobs of design-related ephemera. Give us a whirl. You never know, you might like it. Also, please leave a review for us in iTunes. We'll love you for ever if you do.
89. Cheese and kimchee
In the final episode of season 3, Jon kicks proceedings off with a potentially career-ending rant. The subsequent conversation with Rob takes an unexpected turn courtesy of Jodorowsky's Dune, a Breville Sandwich Maker, wordless novels, giant spiders, martinis and, of course, pies. News is fleeting.
88. Mutually Sporadic
In this week's podcast that's got more Fanny than Craddock, Jon's been playing with his tentacles, while Rob's been gawping at old chaps. We take a gander at the new ultra-post-rationalised Netflix ident, a risable Walkers crisp packet redesign, a Linea Sketch review, and Phillip Sulke's superb tanker photography. Something's in the freezer and it might be alive. Don't worry, it's just Rob's pie.
87. Moldy Warp Speed
In the podcast that no one talks about, we talk moles. Not the unpronounceable notebooks. Not the gloopy green stuff you double dip into (don't deny it). That's right, those little spelunking furry dudes. We also talk Comics / Tabletop Games / Slack Attacks / Elastic Brand Podcast / Dieter Rams / Pies and more…
86. From the depths of my chest freezer
It's Hallowe'en and the portal has opened between the now and the never never. But enough about Rob's bowel movements… This week in the podcast that is and isn't about human sacrifice, our Agents of Filth are rifling through Uncle Ted's VHS collection. Not that one. Rob and Jon talk about their favourite moments in horror films. News includes the End of the World, Slasher Art, A Sleep Tracker for Vampires and Boris Johnson's Underpants. Quelle Horreur! Pies are fresh from Sweeny Todd's… Wait, is that a fingernail. Yum. Wait a minute what's that? It can't be, it can't be. I-i-i-it's a VEGETABLE. Arrrrghhhhh…
85. Bollocky font stuff
This week's episode brings you forgettable fonts, silly phones, easter eggs, Inktober, and an adieu to Carlos Esquerra.
84. I'm not a dunker
You know that dusty old shop that's always closed? You know the one, slumped between CoffeeKings and Harvey's Estate Agents on the high street. That's where episode 84 is being recorded right now. We sent you a text on your Punkt phone. Didn't you get it? Following on from Creative Review's recent flurry of articles on the matter, Rob and Jon ask if design can save retail? Can design save anything at all? They do their best to obfuscate the entire debate. News includes Apple (briefly, you'll be relieved to hear), a new map of Antarctica, Fontsmith's new catalogue, kitbashed spaceships, octogenarian fashion models, Incompuito buildings and a new New Adventures Conference. Pies are consumed like the greedy capitalist pigs we are.
83. Read this panel next, dummy!
This week our very special guest is Dan Berry: host of the wonderful podcast Make It Then Tell Everybody. Dan is also a comic artist, teacher, pen whittler, desk collector, and log cabin dweller.
82. A slipper of a podcast
We're back again, with a hiatus haiku. You are most welcome. The podcast that is, and isn't, but was, on holiday is back. Has the hot summer exposed any hidden secrets in your back garden? We catch up with news and remind ourselves which end of the microphone to hold. Rob looks at orange Lego spaceships, papermakers and Studio Ghibli. Jon takes a look at The Design Museum's events arm(s), a comic in the Booker Prize longlist, and a celebration of the BBC Micro. Switching to Mode 0… Pies are from Aldi and St Margarets. A clear dichotomy of pies, if ever there was one.
81. The one with Mark
We're delighted to have another special guest on the show. This time it's Mark Phoenix, web developer and co-host of the excellent Relative Paths podcast (https://relativepaths.uk). He talks to us from underneath his secret blanket den in Cheltenham about his career in code. Chat meanders across diverse subjects such as grapefruit curses, Baby robins, Extremity comic (https://imagecomics.com/comics/series/extremity), Imaginary Worlds (https://www.imaginaryworldspodcast.org) podcast, Yoda's house (https://shop.lego.com/en-GB/Yoda-s-Hut-75208), Mike Sienkiewicz (https://youtu.be/4G1XAti0NX0) , Brian Eno, the resurgent Microsoft (https://daverupert.com/2015/08/dave-is-going-windows/), imposter syndrome, and, of course, pies. Special Guest: Mark Phoenix.
80. The cross-section of a Damien Hirst
In the podcast that is and isn't about GDPR we discuss anything that doesn't involve mailing lists, sign up forms and panicky marketing teams. Jon is at a crossroads and Rob is generally cross with anything to do with crossing London. What time is love? No one knows, now we're all wearing Nuncs. Also with Roger Dean, Atari and Bill Gold, it's like the Seventies never went away. Now they've gone, it's pie-time! Two of them. Both encased. In case you have forgotten what a pie is.
79. The one with Ben the Illustrator
This week we are joined by special guest and master of the Bézier curve, Ben the Illustrator. News includes an Oliver Postgate exhibition, in-game art in Codemasters' Onrush, Microsoft's adaptive controller for disabled gamers, Monde's bookend models, and the curious case of the European Museum of the year. We talk to Ben about his career in illustration, his creative process, his plans for the future, and why social media should be a two-way conversation. Pies are a Pieminister Kate and Sidney pie (Jon – 7), a Minced Beef pie from Turner's Pies in Chichester (Rob – 8.96), and a John Thorner's Steak and London Pride pie (Ben – 8). Special Guest: Ben the Illustrator.
78. Mountweazel
Our hosts take a listen to a couple of new podcasts and the new sound effect library from the BBC. They ponder the task that faces Flickr's new owners and moot a possible visit to Thought Bubble in Leeds later this year. Rob and Jon discuss tools they use everyday to help them do their work more efficiently. Find out who will survive when the grid shuts down. Jon's pie gets more points than Rob's. The world is in turmoil.
77. The one with Daniel
Daniel Benneworth-Gray — book designer, writer, Twitter noise, and all round nice chap — joins us on the podcast that is, and isn't, about design. We talk about his career in design, as well as gravy carbonisation, and telephone chairs. News includes a new freelance rate calculator, Birmingham Design Festival, Record Store Day, and Rob updates us with Martin Sorrell’s latest movements. This week’s pies are from Marks and Spencer, Pieminister and Yorkshire Baker. One of the pies is called Kevin. Special Guest: Daniel Benneworth-Gray.
76. Biolegio
We're back for series three! Like a run down syphilitic bus. What's happened in our absence? Not a whole lot. Creative Review has gone to the paywall, Charlie Higson got stuck in a twisty maze of passageways, all alike, Fonts got all, like, look at us, we're fonts, we're so academic. And Hellboy is coming to a tabletop near you. This week we talk digital tipping jars: Patreon, Kofi and the like. Rob's considering throwing his flat cap onto the cobbles and asking for donations. Jon works his monocle into his mean little eye and turns his snooty nose skywards. Pies are tested as usual, but no LOTR this week. Old Man Willow stole our books.
75. I love a bit of blank media
In the final episode of a rather intermittent season 2, our emissaries of ephemera discuss whether social media has levelled the playing field for both Davids and Goliaths. News includes Wacom’s artist profile films, how Michael Bierut chooses typefaces, t shirts as design, academicism, The Culture, Dr Who’s rebrand, and Oxford Commas (see what I did there). One pie is disqualified for being a stew with a lid. LOTR Chapter 5: A Conspiracy Unmasked is discussed in the extra bits.
74. Noggin the Nog
This week our podcasting curators visit the British Museum, taking in snarky mugs, cuneiform receipts, Roman curses, walrus chess pieces, Portuguese custard tarts, and a very noisy pub. NB – This episode was recorded in an insanely busy British Museum by a decidedly amateur sound recordist. You have been warned! Also, the podcast now has chapters so you can skip to the bits you want to hear, rather than listen to us waffle. Oh wait, we waffle all the way through every show. Scratch that.
73. It could parch an Elephant
Baaaaad Design: Not bad design in terms of taste, but design for evil. Have you ever designed the packaging for a death ray gun? Or designed the branding for the new build lair of an evil genius. Or maybe you've designed a mailing list signup checkbox that defaults to checked on a form. Our ministers of gloom discuss what makes bad design. News takes the form of a wingéd serpent and spews forth its foul breath of portent – in which you'll find an all-female line up for 2000AD, why a low value of art equals theft, and an Anthony Burrill book from new imprint Volume. LOTR: Chapter 3 – Three is company
72. Emotional Support Peacock
We say goodbye to Mark E. Smith with a new jingle that doesn’t break copyright law.
71. Plasticine eagle
!! NEU FORMAT !! In the Palantír this week: Ben the Illustrator’s illustrator survey, the last pencil factory, Nintendo’s Switch to cardboard, and backward-facing books. The Guardian has had a redesign. North V South takes a look at what’s changed. Pies this week are from Pieminister and Marks and Spencer. Then it’s onto the first chapter of The Lord of the Rings: An unexpected party.
70. Concerning Hobbits
A podcast about, but not about, The Lord of the Rings. Three rings for the Clients who call on Skype, Seven for the Type-Lords who love to moan, Nine for Bearded Hipsters doomed to try (hard), One for the Creative Director on their Aeron throne In the Studio with their headphones on. One podcast to rule them all, One podcast to find them, One podcast to bring them all and in the darkness bore them In the Studio with their headphones on.
69. 69 Dudes!
Happy New Year podcast fans. Here's a new episode in which our hosts reflect on another step forwards towards certain death. News this week include faulty chips, and design news that doesn’t really tell you anything other than there’s not a lot of news about design. Was 2017 a bad year? Will 2018 be a good year? You decide! The chaps talk goals and resolutions. Join them as they tick of the failures. Also the hosts announce their most ambitious feature yet; Read a book one chapter at a time and then talk about it. Shut the door! Pies are Christmas and Moroccan-related.
68. I like the old one better
And so it's Christmas. In this episode Jon continues to moan about Rob's faulty microphone and then forgets to plug in his microphone. So that's why he sounds like he's talking from a dustbin. More than usual. News includes a really stupid camera, a new book on Games Workshop, a new logo for F1, and some really useless tips from "Design Leaders" on how to get a pay rise. The chaps talk about their favourite books, films and designs of the year. Then they eat pie. Hold onto your hats: Jon scores more than a 5.
67. Graphic design for squirrels
Recorded over a month ago, here's an episode of the podcast that is and isn't about design for your aural extremities. We answer your questions while drinking strong beer. It's what we do best. Oh, and review pies, of course.
66. Computers are great, but humans are idiots
This week North V South goes on a field trip to the Design Museum. Find out just what our roving reporters made of the museum’s new home in West London. News sees us step closer to the world of Blade Runner with an image enhancer algorithm, and a step further away with an self driving bus crash. And as a general reminder that humans have been idiots since they left the trees, we look at Medieval Deathbot and Snapchat’s $30 million dollar silly glasses writedown. Pies are stewed beef for Jon, and a bog standard pork pie for Rob.
65. That's a load of old Saatchi nonsense
This week the podcast is live from Instagram Live. That is, once Jon turns on his phone. Once that load of old nonsense is out of the way our intrepid reporters bring you a fresh heap of more design-related nonsense: Facets, printers, telegram love, Hero Forge and space history are all up for discussion. Then settle down and pull the tartan rug over your knees as Grandpa Rob explains social media to Granddad Jon. Grandpa Rob forgot his teeth so no pie for him. Grandad Jon gums his way through a bizarrely-named Zanzibar bean and coconut pie.
64. I must learn how to make Origami penguins
This episode talks about Blade Runner 2049. If you haven’t seen it yet then this is the mandatory PLOT SPOILER ALERT! Stupid cameras, memorable high street logos, a swimming pool filled with gold. All the news, none of it very useful. So all the better for it. The chaps went on a rare NVS Field Trip to see the new Blade Runner sequel. They talk about the film’s legacy and sources of inspiration, the central themes of the film, and how hot Ryan Gosling is. Pies this week feature a chicken and ham made by the Royals, and a beef and chilli made by committee. The manufacturer recommends serving the latter with a salsa. We say up no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no.
63. Have you been drinking coffee?
With both hosts engaged in Inktober it’s only apt that they do some self promotion / neurotic hand-wringing on this week’s episode. In news, Dropbox gets all nu-rave, Sonos journeys into the Amazon, Timothy Toothbrush says hi, and UKIP’s rebrand gets them into hot water. Hopefully. Rob teaches Jon about using Instagram as a promotional tool rather than a social media anxiety generator. A cold pie this week for Jon gets a uncharacteristically high score. Rob’s is chicken and ham heaven. Quite literally, if you’re a pig or a chicken*. And you believe in a deity*. *Pies are not diety.
62. I put the Pro into Prolapse
October brings the daily onslaught that is Inktober. Our hosts discuss their chosen subjects. News includes illustrators’ dirty secrets, Bloomsbury’s new classic book cover designs, the sinister rise of both sponsored content and, of course, abused sex robots. This week sees a return of the book review, with a thumb through Mike Monteiro’s “You’re my favorite client”: A book for clients about the design process. The chaps also stumble through what they did in the day in a futile attempt to make it sound like they have meaningful lives. Once they’ve failed that, it’s onto pies. Jon reviews something that is quite plainly a quiche. Rob keeps it real with a steak and ale pie.
61. At least our gramophones will still work
A little owl, a favourite tree, interesting words and a can of root beer. It can only be North v South; the podcast that is, and isn’t, about design. This week locks digital and analogue in a fight to the death. Our hosts chat about why we love some superseded technologies and why patina is so important to humans. talk turns to what constitutes being alive, and ends on the irrefutable fact that everything changes. Humans just don’t like it. After that Rob and Jon decant their brains back into their craniums and try some pies. Everything might change, but our show always ends in pies.
60. Columbo 1492
Listen to stout men drink stout and spout. Yes, it’s North V South. This week our hosts talk kitbashing, expanding clothing, Winnie the Pooh, print errata and Sonic the Hedgehog. Rob and Jon return to Dunkirk to talk about frames and containers. We look at the origins of the 4:3 format, 35mm film and ask why widescreen is a thing. Many questions remain unanswered but a damn good time is had trying to answer them. Charlie Bigham returns to generously share his Chicken and Mushroom pie with Jon. Rob tries to contact alien life with his frozen Steak and Ale pie from Sainso’s.
59. I haven't heard any fizz coming from your end
We're back. Again. Like a bad smell that everyone knows is a decomposing rat under the floorboards but is too polite to say so. This week our intrepid explorers of design discover the meaning of the phrases Kensington Gore and Etaoin Shrdlu, as well as looking at a £650 box of Lego, Erik Spiekermann's storm in a tweet cup, BBC Sport's new typeface and Pantone's oh-so generous donation to the Purple One's Estate*. Our first great pie disaster means that Jon is literally scraping the floor for his pie this week. This week only, we're giving away RGB 230,33,53 for FREE. Use it wherever you like.
58. Did he do Miami Vice?
Freshly returned from the beaches of Northern France, a bottle of beer in one hand and a jam sandwich in the other, Mr Elliman chats with Mr Turpin about what they’ve been up to for the last few weeks, as well as news of sentient toothbrushes, robot journalists and colour systems. Rob and Jon have been to the cinema to see Christopher Nolan’s latest film, Dunkirk. They’ve got quite a lot to say about their experiences. Some of it is lucid. Listen on to find out what Dunkirk, Jan Hammer and giant thrips have (or don’t have) in common. Rob just about gets away with a pie review this week*. He scoffed a shepherd’s pie for lunch at the Ivy in Richmond. Jon pops a couple of Tesco Melton Mowbrays in his piehole. Written warning in the post.
57. Mine would be Tarzan Willey
*** STARTING ELLIBOT 1.01 *** *** RUNNING SCRIPT *** +++ START MESSAGE +++ It’s been holiday season for the southern half of the podcast that is, and isn’t, about design. Despite this, server crashes and recording gear not working, here’s the latest episode for your aural relish. This week, bereft of anything interesting to talk about, the gents talk about some websites of note. Well, Rob does anyway. This week’s pies are layered chicken and ham layered slice from Sainsbury’s and a chicken, ham hock, and leek pie from Armstrong’s in St Margarets. +++ END-OF-MESSAGE +++
56. This is exactly what we are not
This week’s news includes a crowd-funded record player and night light that are, quite frankly, codswallop. Southbank’s new rebrand gets a quick look at, as well as a facelift for the British Gas smart thermostat, Hive. The gents politely raise their hats (revealing marmalade sandwiches) to Michael Bond and say farewell. Milton Glaser’s Ten Things I Have Learned is a collection of observations, philosophies and soundbites that the great designer has been hawking about for at least 18 years. We sprinkle this design gold dust onto our resident cavemen and see what happens. You’ll be cock-a-hoop to know that this week’s pies are fully encased. The fact that the filling resembles cat food is not so promising.
55. Sonic the Hedgehog ruined my life
This week, in the podcast that is and isn’t about design, your hosts swim through a tree, explore the grey area surrounding the white of the Polish flag and investigate the disappearance of a mummified toe from a bar in Canada. Rob and Jon then talk about the influence and power of books. They ask each other about the reasons why they read, and discuss a few books that really made a difference in their lives. Both pies this week are very probably not pies. Beers are from the Adnams and Redemption breweries.
54. Is this why you like Japanese bathrooms?
In the design podcast that can’t quite get its act together, our hosts look upon the new releases from Apple, gaze upon a new blue pigment, ponder upon the usefulness of a naming and shaming site for non payers, and marvel upon the comic version of the New York Times Magazine. This week Jon and Rob talk about their favourite film posters; from Star Wars to Kill Bill, You Only Live Twice to the Exorcist. Pies today are brought to you from Marks and Spencer, chickens and leeks.
53. Dirty, filthy, rotten martini
This week's show reverberates to some light jazz and the clatter of ice in a cocktail shaker. Our hosts raise a v-shaped glass to the late, great Sir Roger Moore. The chaps return to talking about education and the best way forward for people looking to further their design education. The martinis don't help them make their minds up. Or much sense. This episode is bookended with recipes from dead celebrities. Jon wings it with one of Linda McCartney's Vegetarian Country pies. Like her singing, it's not very good.
52. Hang on, you hired me!
If this week’s North V South sounds a bit tinny at the beginning, don't worry, that’s just Rob’s medicine being opened. Meanwhile, on the other side of the world*, Jon hunts a Gruffalo and rescues a rabbit†. We look forward to newly launched magazines: Pressing Matters and Typenotes. Rob wonders if Ryan Gosling’s new Blade Runner will deliver the Golden Goose’s egg or perhaps a pickled egg? Judge Dredd is coming to TV. Will they get Mega City One right? NVS met up earlier this week and saw Paula Scher deliver a fascinating talk at the Royal Geographical Society in Knightsbridge. She was promoting a new book on her life’s work by Unit Editions called Paula Scher: Works. Hear the chaps discuss what they made of it. Rob scoffs a Higgidy Chicken, bacon and mushroom pie while Jon chomps his way through a delicious rabbit and bacon pie. He is not happy with the new label for Timothy Taylor’s Landlord. TTD † Jon later enjoys a rabbit and bacon pie. These events are not connected.
51. The Natural Portrait Museum
Another episode that’s as painful as a tooth extraction. Which is exactly what Mr Turpin has been though this week. Jon drinks a beer so strong that it explains his subsequent descent into gibberish. News this week includes a farewell to the creator of the Bash Street Kids, a map identification schematic and a grouchy gripe about digital content ownership. Ordanance Survey we’re looking at you. From behind the tumulus. Our hosts then talk about process versus creativity. Can one exists without the other? Can either be taught? Why is Jon talking about medieval misericords? Listen on to find out more… Both pies are from Sainsbury’s Taste the Difference range. Jon’s Chicken and Ham doesn’t taste any different to chicken soup. Rob’s Chicken and Porcini could do with a grind of the old mill. He’s never far from heavy industry that lad.
50. Cornish pesto
Sit tight for the next hour and a half (you ‘eard) of regionally-opposed design-related discourse: It’s the 50th episode of the podcast that is and isn’t about design. This week’s special edition looks at the A-Z of typography. Our two presenters are hardly the font of all type knowledge but they’ve been bold and taken a pica into the wonderful world of type. It's 11am. Rob eats a truffled pie washed down with a beer. Jon has a freshly baked custard tart and a cup of coffee. He’s not an animal.
49. Probably earthworm-flavoured
Self doubt in design This week North V South looks at self doubt. Self doubt can be crippling but it also drives some designers and artists to produce great work. How can you find a healthy balance in your working life? Is it possible? Do you need to be a superstar or work for the biggest brands to get satisfaction in your work? Who knows. What we do know is that there will always be pies. Listen on, dear listener…
48. My Bontempi organ is in the workshop
Like the Kleeneze man, North V South turns up unannounced at random times in the day and then outstays its welcome. This week the guardians of the drifting space hulk HMS NVS listen in to faded radio waves from the motherworld about a man correcting grammar on the streets of Bristol, photographs of stranded ships and Jean-Michel Jarre's French Bulldog-shaped speakers. Rob and Jon then have a gander at their three favourite pieces of graphic design. Jon, as usual, questions the question and slides further into self doubt and paranoia. Rob drinks a couple of excellent German beers. Pies are of the pork variety. Oh, and would you like to buy some magic dusters?
47. I like to read sci-fi on Kindle because it makes me feel futuristic
Whether it’s a new series, season or the hiatus has just an extended break, North V South is back. The clamours for the return of the podcast that is, and isn’t, about design have been relentless. If by relentless I mean entirely lacking, then that’s exactly what I mean. Our good gentle hosts prattle on about what they’ve been up to over the last five weeks. They then furkle through tidbits of news they’ve kept at the back of the fridge. It’s a good week for pies. Jon would like to adjust his score from a six to a seven. To find out more you’ll have to listen to the podcast.
46. Are you calling my wife a dumb waiter?
In the final episode of this current series North V South catches up with the presenters’ own personal projects and they ponder upon why it’s so hard being your own client. Rob and Jon look into the continuation of the 2016 pigment wars, Google’s Blade Runner-ish image technology, McLaren’s Trump-coloured car and Ian Livingston’s return to writing Fighting Fantasy books. Jon uses the phrases “anal fistula” and “shout out”. For this, North V South apologises. Pies are quite good this week. See you in a few weeks!
45. Trying to extract emus from lederhosen
News this week includes David Hockney’s strange Sun newspaper collaboration, filter out the bad stuff with The Good News Network and an introduction to nanography, whatever that might be. This week North V South looks at design for good.
44. I don't want a tropical episode
North V South has reached its first birthday, the very existence of which is an utter miracle. The duo sit, wrapped in their Space Wolf furs, droning on about drones, Barnbrook, IKEA’s latest award, Lego Life and Peta’s recent bonkers broadside at the futuristic world of Warhammer 40,000. Rob and Jon abandon their monochromatic homelands and go on a quest for a fabled colour utopia. Along the way they talk about colour perception, colour management, colour archives and why choosing colour is so damned hard. Listen on to find out if canned pies can indeed taste nice, and why the term gluten free should never be applied to pies.
43. I'm not Alan Partridge
Hello and welcome to 2017. We're a bit late off the mark due to illness and business, so we start the year with an apology. Which is probably apt, given the state of the world at the moment. The chaps catch up post-Christmas and look forward to what's in store for each of them in 2017. In amongst that is some news about Wacom's new sketchy gadget, tech trends, the new Star Wars film (SPOILER ALERT!) and The KLF. Chicken pies are served. Only one of them may possibly have been made by Her Majesty. The other one died in vain.
42. A life-changing mouse mat
It’s Christmas time. There’s no need to be afraid. It’s just NVS in its Janus mask. That’s Janus, so stop your sniggering. We look back over the year and try to find positives in a sea of bad ju-ju. Pies in space: No, not one of Rob’s less grubby fantasies, but a reality thanks to the Wigan World Pie Eating Championships. Who said British endeavour was dead? Other news includes a new skyscraper for London, 2000AD coming to a tabletop near you and a rather expensive bottle of whisky that comes embedded in a tree.
41. My star was slightly off centre
This week the podcast welcomes its first ever guest: Mr Aled Lewis. Aled is an illustrator and designer based in London. Aled talks about his career so far and how he got started in the creative industry. There’s not much time for news this week but the boys look at the end of the Pick Me Up show, Jessica Hische’s automated response generator and the BBC program about the graphic designer with Parkinson’s. Is it dusty in here? There’s something in my eye. Christmas presents: What’s on the wish-list, what not to buy and what the chaps think are great gifts for your loved ones (that deep down you secretly covet for yourself.) Pies this week came from Betty’s in Yorkshire, courtesy of the very lovely Hannah Wilson. North V South records the world’s (possibly) very first Mince Pie Consumption Simulcast™.
40. The Bridge of Pies
Rob clings to a glass of port in a stormy week, while Jon sips Early Grey from porcelain, pinky aloft, monocle firmly clenched in his roving eye. As Pebble plummets into the ocean of redundant tech we wonder if smartwatches are actually not that smart. Jon’s hair is ruffled by Google’s wind-powered server farms, while Rob’s syrup stays in place with a dab of Bostonian molasses. This week the gents ponder over the pearls of wisdom they would cast upon their younger selves. If only they would just listen… Pies are mincey. It’s nearly Christmas after all.
39. The Manhattan Transfer Project
This week’s episode is filled to the brim with mince. That’s enough about our hosts and, so, on with the show. News this week includes stuff about Manhattan, Grayson Perry, Wetransfer, The Smiths and Mr Bill Drummond. The chaps talk about scheduling work, worrying about the cliff and what they do to try to bring order to their work. It’s December and so begins our intrepid explorers’ hunt for the UK’s best mince pie. Rob’s off to a strong start and Jon had to nip to Co-op because he’d forgotten it was December.
38. I've never been into clams
North V South doesn’t let British rail and broadband providers’ ineptitude get in the way of producing another show that is and isn’t about design. In episode 38, news this week includes a look at the Frankenstein’s monster of Apple’s new festive ad. Rob asks whether the new Hockney windows at Westminster Abbey are going to look out of place? And Jon asks if VR is going to change the art world? (Answer: no.) Today we climb on board the USS Palomino and journey into cultural black holes. There’s a difference in approach between the known unknowns Rob) and the unknown unknowns (Jon). Rob fares better as Jon couldn’t figure out what the unknown unknowns were because he didn’t know. Pies are then reviewed.
37. Folding away to the size of a large banana
North V South is full of love this week. This week we explore the ifs, whys and wherefores about loving design. Listen to the chaps turn a simple question into an existential primal scream.
36. Can you be more Pacific?
We’re back. Before you even noticed we’d gone. The world may have changed inexorably in our absence but we’re still banging on about the same old rubbish, so listen on, dear listener… News this week looks at Toblerone’s gap in the market, Kingsmill bread and a Lego Yellow Submarine complete with Fab Four Minifigs. The chaps then talk about their pet hates. Get ready for a moanfest. Ding dong. Rob gets all Christmassy this week with his pie. It is November after all.
35. I'll get to fondle your stock
In this special Hallowe’en episode we fail to mention Hallowe’en once. Spooky! This week the all-seeing eyeball roams over Hogarth’s Gin Lane reimagined, Somerset House’s fillip for artists, Vine’s demise and, finally, rants over a rash of pretentious Kickstarter campaigns. Frenzied! Rob explores the ins and outs of selling your own work as an illustrator. He uses words like monetise. Shocking! Pies this week include a vegetarian pie from a butchers. Horror!
34. I love a bit of spot welding
“Communication let me down, And I’m left here.” So said Spandau Ballet. It was about the only time they ever made any sense. Good video too. Where was I? Oh yes, this week the chaps are talking about how they communicate with clients – or not as may be the case. Yo! News this week includes a Japanese-themed rebrand for the UK-based sushi chain. A truck with video screens built in to reduce road deaths. And a snappy new logo for Kodak predictably plucked from the archives. But what packaging! This week’s pie was sent to us by Mike Sullivan, top designer and top chef too, it turns out. The venison, skirt, onion and mushroom pie scores a whopping 19 out of 20. Sensational. He’d even put fancy lattice bits on the top.
33. I don't feel like I can speak to you sober
Rob hobbles into the studio this week clutching a swollen jaw. No, we didn’t have a fight. We just went for a little walk along a riverbank. News this week looks at the proliferation of a side of lifestyle images with everything. Easy on the Dachshund, Luigi. Rob looks into eerie images of apartments in New York’s libraries while waiting for his wireless kettle to boil. Grids are the main topic this week. We ask “what is a grid?”. It's hardly All the President’s Men is it? Jon gets confused as per usual. Rob gets riled about post-rationalised grids. Pies fare a bit better this week apart from some copywriting issues.
32. The size of our bladders in minutes
This week Rob and Jon take a look at what could be an instant hit for Leica, Natwest's new logo and an honest look at pricing in design agencies.
31. Dull in our own special dull way
Another episode of Rob’s mum’s favourite podcast* looks at why news gatherers are so lazy by reading out news from news aggregate sites. What is the relevance of 117? How many spoons can a spoon whittler whittle? And why on earth is there a tank on top of the South Downs? Jon then gets all regionalist when he forgets the names of large swathes of the beautiful North. Typical. This week the Gents talk about dream houses. Where would you live and what would you live in? Moats, Mulberry trees, billiard rooms, gold banisters and mountain top observatories are just some of the ideas bandied about. Pies arrive and pass without much of a fuss, as they continue to dream… *At time of last survey.
30. Eyelashes like cartoon owls
The news this week seems to be full of Kickstarter projects. The chaps also look at a new approach to kickstarting your design education in just three months. The book of the month is Bill Drummond's 45, a memoir of his life at that point in time and a truly great book about art, music and the perception of truth. NVS thoroughly enjoyed it and urge you to read it. Rob returns to a fertile pie source while Jon ferrets around in the freezer for yet another disappointment. Beer is also drunk.
29. Like the paws of an otter
This week NVS is out about in at The V&A in the first field trip. The boys review its new show with the snappy title of “You Say You Want a Revolution? Records and Rebels 1966 - 1970”.
28. He buried his cheese
In our hottest episode yet we find out that the always-odd Bjork is doing a spot of 360 VR at Somerset House. We chat about The Design Museum’s design awards, a sale of Second World War vehicles and we say adieu to Mr Gene Wilder. 350 years ago the Great Fire of London broke out in a baker’s shop in Pudding Lane. We discuss this monumental event (see what I did there) and talk about lost buildings we would love to have visited. This week Rob’s posh pork pie from Selfridges knocks Jon's humble mince beef pie out of the park with an 8 out of 10.
27. Here be whales
In the latest episode of Rob’s mum’s favourite podcast*, we catch up in the latest design/non-design news including a new neighbour for planet Earth, flockingly good bird photomontages and old photos of inky-fingered Fleet Street. Following on from our chat about secret places from last week, we talk about maps. We get completely lost discussing their origins. This week sees an all time low in pies. We’d have been better off with a nice salad. *Allegedly
26. Do you want to see Napoleon's body?
The 25% extra free episode. Secret bonus laughter track. Interminable drivel guaranteed. The chaps catch up with the latest design news freshly scraped from the bottom of a barrel. It is August after all. Secret places are on the menu du jour today. But you’ll have to listen to find out more. Pies of dubious credentials are partaken of, and rather enjoyed, by our two young heroes.
25. Scratching the tip of the iceberg
25 episodes. Illustration. Lists. Mash them all together and what have you got? That’s right, you’ve got a list of 25 things to do with illustration. We talk about the illustrators and tools that have inspired us; from childhood, right up to the present day. And if you get through that lot, we then talk pies. Pies, generously sent through the post by Rob’s lovely mother, all the way from Yorkshire.
24. That’s my Richard Chamberlain sound effect
Konnichiwa! We’re back! Did you miss us? No, we didn’t think so. We chat about Airbnb’s new design studio, Brighton’s new eye(sore), Rob talks wistfully about his old tutor while Jon tries out Adobe’s Portfolio. Our book of the month is In Praise of Shadows by Junichiro Tanizaki. We discuss the book deep in bosky contemplation, while perched upon Japanese toilets. The serenity is rudely broken by the arrival of Jon’s stonking pea and ham pie and Rob’s bum-tingling chilli pork pie, kindly donated by one of our listeners.
23. Scrambled egg sandwich
We talk about comics for a while and then remember that this podcast is, but isn't, about design. So we prattle on about Roald Dahl, camera lenses, work spaces, tennis balls and Argentinian bookshops. After the recent “recycled” coffee cup revelations, our main topic this week was waste. Does capitalism give value to anything other than pure profit? We talk about our own impact on the environment and what we can do to make less of an impact on resources. It’s a subject to which we will return. We then eat pies. Rob’s has got pork scratchings sprinkled on top, which is just naughty. Jon’s is so hot it could solve the energy crisis.
22. Something, something, something, kumquats
Everyone’s favourite podcast called North V South is back after a week’s break. We catch up with the latest design news: Jon finds out that Elon Musk is not a BodyShop fragrance. We also look at another rebrand using nostalgia as a weapon of mass distraction. Jon talks about Frank, his WW1-based daily diary project from 2014, and how the tight deadlines made the writing process both a challenge and a pleasure. Rob scoffs a Royal pie. Jon is pleasantly surprised by Aldi.
21. A pair of bricks and a loud klaxon
This week in the podcast that is and isn’t about design, we look back to a halcyon time which may or may not have existed*. We talk about the triumph of Jeremy Deller’s latest art project, the London Museum of Brands and Lego’s latest nostalgic model of a VW Beetle. Nostalgia is our topic of the week. Other chocolate-based confectionaries are available. Do they still make Topics**? Watchmen is our book of the month. We enjoy it as much as you can enjoy a comic that’s about self loathing crime fighters. Pies are then scoffed as they should be. It didn’t. ** They do.
20. I have seen fireflies
This week’s episode is all about space. There isn’t anywhere else to go that isn’t all doom and gloom. Rob takes a look at his lifelong fascination with all things space-related. We hear about the latest happenings in space exploration and Rob goes on to talk about the influences in his life as a sci-fi illustrator.
19. I hope that next week we’re still broadcasting from Europe
WARNING: This podcast contains upbeat positivity and hope for the future of the UK. It turns out we are not very reliable futurologists. We catch up with the latest design news in a world where, for now, it seems the dishonest, ill-informed and downright unpleasant are king. On the eve of what’s turned out to be the biggest break-up of our lives, we discuss what happens when things go horribly wrong with your clients. Pies are eaten.
18. I might adopt a flatworm or something
Rob and Jon kick off this week’s podcast with some amazing Friday night banter: Graphic file formats. We talk about redesigning death, Tate’s brand refresh and look at a new cut of the classic typeface Johnston. As our nation teeters on the edge of being European, we turn our attention to notebooks: the debate consuming the nation. Jon’s pie this week is a surprise early Fathers’ Day gift. Rob sets fire to his mouth with a hot one.
17. Feeding on the bottoms of mid-stream fish
This week Rob airs his dirty laundry in the revamped Ikea bag, while Jon curls his lip at Michael Wolff’s archly lupine comments about the new British Steel logo. We then prattle on about knolling and networking. Rob grapples with a pie that is defined, but ultimately ruined by, a slice of Chorizo while Jon sings from the terraces with a basic steak pie from Tesco.
16. The king of post-rationalisation
After a week’s hiatus, which can be painful if not carefully managed, our intrepid presenters are rejoined in dialectic dysfunction. We jump into a design time machine and take a look at new logos from British Steel and Co-op, as well as rooms frozen in time (or not). The boys then jump back to 175,000 years to a meeting with Neanderthal architects. A lack of decent coffee forces their swift return. It’s a birthday in some form or another for both our businesses, and so we look forward to what the future brings. Indigestion if Jon’s pies are anything to go by.
15. Talking rot and expecting people to listen
This week we are talking about mistakes in design. For once we live up to our name as a diametrically opposed podcast and disagree with each other. Surely shome mishtake? Jon’s pork pie gets a lot of love. Consumed by pie envy, Rob embarks on a desperate quest across several counties for a rival. He fails.
14. Like a hot potato that came in through the window
This week Rob p-p-p-picks up a new edition of Pocket Penguins. It's not the only bird he's picked up this week. We talk 3D soundwaves and discuss the new Instagram logo like we just don't care: We really don't care. Our book of the month is "Insanely Great" by Steven Levy. We explore the origins of the tool that pays our mortgages, hitch a ride back to 1995 and the story of the birth of the Macintosh. The pies this week turn out to be boils on the behind of Beelzebub himself. But we still eat them anyway.
13. Reducing the probability of not succeeding
Episode thirteen, the unluckiest podcast yet from North V South, explores good fortune in careers. This week we look at a sinister machine that turns itself off, Jon goes a bit cuckoo and tries to explain post digital, while Rob coos at mating pigeons and miniature houses. We discuss whether you make your own luck by just working hard or if the hands of the gods are upon us like that film with the mechanical owl in it. We then present a synchronised pie review for the first time.
12. The staple’s terribly painful
An episode in which we talk about design quite a lot for a podcast that is and isn’t about design. We chat about Dyson going viral, revisit Japan’s Olympics logo and we look at some pictures that could be straight off the set of Blade Runner 2. But they’re not. Jon gets all hot under the collar about fake marketing campaigns and flimsy pseudo lifestyle businesses. Perhaps he picked up a virus from the hand dryer? Our tenacious duo then tackle and try to solve the free pitch dilemma. Did they do it? Did they heck. Pies are then partaken of and farewells made.
11. Put Bovril in everything
This week’s episode contains reviews of two mediocre pies and a startling revelation about Michael Bentine. Our rambling discourse takes a stroll through Victorian space exploration, vastly overpaid executives and the origins of the word Bovril. We talk about music in office culture and the various stereotypes one might meet when working in a studio. Then Jon drops the Potty bomb. Listen on, reader-listeners. With your eye-ears.
10. Let the Wild Horses out of the bag
This week our intrepid heroes talk about getting paid. The chaps talk about The Guardian’s experimental design layouts, Erik Spiekermann’s print shop, British Steel logo redux, a grundie exhibition at the V&A and the new, very silly, Kindle.
9. Wizard wings
This week in the podcast that might or might not be very good, we don't sound like we're having a chat in a dustbin. Which might or might not be a good thing. We talk about the ephemeral nature of the internet of things, one pound coins, HP's new old logo, personal projects and, of course, pies.
8. It's a pie. But it's not.
Today's episode is a week late due to eggs and weddings. We talk about the ageing Intercity 125 and its role in the British sandwich revolution(role, roll, geddit? Aah never mind). We then ruminate over cheap design services and why designers get their knickers in such a twist over them. That discussion leads us neatly on to the book of the month, Design is a Job by Mike Monteiro, which basically tell us to be professional, pull our trousers up and stop blaming the client. We then review one authentic pie and a quiche that is masquerading as a pie. The hunt for a vegetable-based pie continues…
7. Stilton that's been inside it since 1978
Today's episode is brought to you by pickle-powered pies. We talk about news that revolves around artificial intelligence, 360° videos and Bagpuss. But possibly not all at the same time. Our intrepid duo then talk about design convergence, and whether that's a good thing. Answer: It probably isn't. Both Rob(democratically)and Jon(autocratically) ended up with pickle-infused pies. And we can honestly say that this is not a good thing either.
6. He looks like an advert for nominative determinism
In this episode we discuss design awards from the unique perspective of never having won any design awards. Although Jon once got a certificate from a Lego building competition in 1978. The chaps discuss the pros and cons of design awards. Listen to find out whether con is the pejorative. Rob's pie this week has its own helipad. Jon has two pies. They fail to mention the fact that it's National Pie Week, mainly because there's no such thing as National Pie Week.
5. I'm printing out Wikipedia as we speak
In this episode of everyone’s favourite podcast with pies and regional accents, we are furkling around in binary middens. Rob talks about a daily newspaper launch in the UK. Jon reveals his ignorance of world news. Jon wonders about what will happen to our digital stuff. He discusses whether anything we create online has any value and whether archaeologists in the future will think people from our time are vacuous consumers of emptiness. Rob eats a pie.
4. Ooh la la, Continental
A new episode of the only podcast guaranteed free of electrical interference thanks to factory-grade unicorn dust. We talk about the brouhaha around a couple of recent rebrands. We sad face Facebook's new response icons. We chat about our book of the month, The City and the City by China Mieville. Rob navigates the conversation around why he didn't do a drawing for the show, while Jon says the words "erm" and "brouhaha" an alarming number of times. Pies are then eaten and judged as they should be.
3. Like a withered Bonsai
We delve into the important things in life: Pies, as ever, gravitational waves (whatever they are) and post-it notes. In this episode Rob tries to teach Jon about new scientific discoveries and almost succeeds. Jon blethers on about how he deals with procrastination. The chaps then masticate as quietly as they can and compare pies.
2. Attack it with a metal spike
We've improved the sound quality and added a jingle. What larks. Next time we might add a website. In this episode Rob questions Jon about his dubious qualifications as a designer and how he got to what he does today. Jon then drivels on inexorably until Rob breaks off the interview to eat a ham hock and pea pie, while Jon continues his trawl through the lower echelons of pies.
1. A variety of mustards
The inaugural episode of our new podcast about but not about design. We have no idea how or what we are doing. There's no jingle yet. Join the confusion! In this episode Rob tells Jon how he got into design and how he kicked off his illustration career. Jon then makes Rob jealous by talking about his new iPad Pro and Apple Pencil. Then he eats a pork pie and drinks some beer just to rub it in.
